Mischief

[What are you doing?]

They didn’t look up. [Having fun]

[That’s all you do these days. Don’t you think you should get back to real work?]

[Hey, I’ve worked hard enough for a million lifetimes. I’m entitled to have some fun.]

[I agree, but don’t you think you were having fun before and having a much larger effect?]

[Oh, I’m past all that now. It was all well and good to make decisions that affected just a few people but it’s different now. There are too many of them and nothing I do makes a difference anymore to the bulk of them. It’s much more satisfying to work on a micro-level.]

[I can’t argue with you, you know, but I am not a fan. What are you doing anyway?] They pulled a chair from the void and sat down though all the other one had to do was allow them to see with a thought. It was less than a thought actually, as those could create or destroy galaxies as quickly as we could inadvertently step on an ant and with the same lack of intent or notice.

[I am messing with this guy in a coffee shop. I introduced him to this girl a few weeks ago and they’ve been texting all the time and went on a day-date that went really well and extended into the evening. They spent last night together, but didn’t go past second base.]

[You still have them calling it second base?]

Something like a sigh escaped from the being and three asteroids changed onto paths that would lead them to striking planets a few million of our years later. [Yes. I do. Baseball is my greatest creation and I have told you over and over again and that  …]

[Only because it’s the closest thing to an eternity to get through a match for humans. You know they are using it as an eternity tester over at the Infinity Project.]  The intrusion of the interruption caused seven stars to go supernova in the galaxy, but no notice was paid by either.

[Game.]

[Pardon?]

[It’s a game, not a match.]

The other smiled as much as it could be described as such and, as a result a baby was born in their fiefdom that would wreak havoc and cause billions of lives to be lost in a dispute over a substance that was so common on other worlds that it was used for useless things such as newspapers and seat belts, but was rare on that particular planet due to an allocation dispute in the paint department  over the proper color of rainbows in a sulphuric atmosphere. 

[’m sorry. I shouldn’t tease you like a little sibling, though there are myriad arguments that is exactly what you are.]

The other stared back and took a beat that measured a million years in some parts of the galaxy, but only a second in the world which was their current focus before continuing. [Anyway, they woke up this morning and went to get coffee and have been getting along well, so I threw a wrench in.]

[What kind of wrench?]

[Well, she’s from the North and he’s from the South, but they get along pretty well politically, so there wasn’t much room there, but I had her mention how people in her area consider a southern accent a sign that someone wasn’t very intelligent. She immediately tried to take it back but I let him jump in before she could explain it away.]

[What is he saying?]

[Here. Listen.

In the coffee shop, the young couple sat across the table from each other. The exposed brick gave it the requisite old-factory vibe and the out of season holiday decorations added the quirk that made people bring their friends from out of town to prove that yes, there were cool things here too.  Their hands had been touching, but she had pulled hers away when she saw the hurt look on his face after her comment. She was waving both of hers around now, trying to formulate the words to explain how it didn’t apply to him, but he had already started responding.

“Just because you are from New York doesn’t mean you’re smarter than anyone down here. I know lots of people smarter than anyone I’ve met from up there,” he said. She could hear anger, but mostly hurt in his voice.

“I’m from New Hampshire, not New York and I know you’re smart. I’m just saying that is how some people think when they hear a southern accent.”

“Well, when I hear a northern accent, I assume whoever is speaking is rude and mannerless,” he said. This caused her to pause and he took advantage of the space. “Plus, I don’t even have an accent, so I don’t see why you would have even said that to me.”

She couldn’t stop her eyes from going wide at the remark. “You don’t think you have a southern accent?”

[Watch this] the manipulating being said.

The male stared at her before responding. “Maybe a little, but it’s nothing like a lot of them.” He could hear the extra syllable he put in “like” as it came out of his mouth. “Seriously, it’s not that bad.” The “seriously” came out in three, rushed syllables and he quickly shut his mouth, but was able to stop himself from slapping his hand across it.

[Did you make his accent more pronounced?]

[I did] With the semblance of a smile, magma began to build pressure under the dome in Yellowstone.

[You have always been the cruelest among us, you know?]

[I allowed free-will and look what happened. I thought you'd be happy I am back in the game a bit.]

[Well, yes, but we were thinking you would be more involved all over. You know, procurement gave you 6,000,000,000 habitable worlds to work with and you’re still stuck in this one.]

[Yes, but I have an infinity of possibilities with this one planet, with this coffee shop, with these two. What do I need with all those other worlds? Some of them are seeded anyway. They’ll be hopping in a few billion years when I’m ready to move on.]

[Meanwhile, you sit and torture this man…]

She responded, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I would be mad if you told me your friends thought the same way about my accent. I think your accent is lovely and that it’s cute when it gets worse…I mean even better, when you get anxious.” He continued to stare at her, but his face softened as he tried to think of something to say. She reached and touched his hand again and shifted her legs until her knee touched his. “Plus, I think it’s kind of sexy.”

[That was sweet of you.]

[I didn’t have her say that.] Imagine a brow furrowing and tectonic plates colliding on over a million of those 6,000,000,000 planets.

[Allowing free-will to take reign again, I see.]

[No. Seriously. I don’t know what is going on right now.] An amino acid chain was struck by lightning on one of the 6,000,000,000. [Are you doing this?] The accusation shifted orbits across half of infinity which caused the math department to spiral into a crisis mode that wouldn’t be resolved for millenia. 

[You know the answer to that. Are you really not in control?] There was a giddiness in the query. The entire company looked chaotic, but it was rare that something ever happened that hadn’t been planned and the repercussions of such an event seemed delicious to the other being.

[Of course I am in control.] The tone of the response indicated otherwise.

He finally was able to form words. “Thank you. That was incredibly nice of you to say. I’m sorry I overreacted. I guess I get a little defensive about my hometown sometimes. Gods know, it’s not perfect, but I’ve carved out this corner of it and I put my head down to the rest sometimes.” He returned pressure with his knee and stroked her hand lightly and she noticed how his were so much larger than hers. “And I think your accent is sexy too.”

“Good. Then we agree that we should talk a lot more to hear those sexy accents.” The smile on her face made his face crack reflexively and he could feel his cheeks go flush.

“It’s a deal,’ he replied. “Hey, what is something you’ll never hear a Southerner say?”

“What,” she replied with a smile.

“I’ll take Physics for $1000, Alex.” 

Her smile got wider and he told her years later that he swore he had felt his heart skip a beat at that moment (which was actually true and was the precursor to a heart condition she would implore him to get checked) 

“Sexy and funny.” she said.

“Sexy and a bad liar,” he smiled in reply. They sat silently and sipped on their drinks, their hands continuing to touch and gently caress.

[So?]

{so, what?] There was still agitation in the response and the mountain ranges on the million worlds continued to grow and the amino acid chains were getting more complex with each moment

[Is everything OK?]

{of course it is. I was distracted for a moment by you carping on me about working on those other worlds. You really shouldn’t bother me while I’m working, especially if you’re going to complain that I don’t work enough.]

[I’m sorry and you’re right. That was sweet of you to throw the bone to him. He was in a bad spot and you had the young lady rescue him and account well for your creations.]

[Thank you. It’s not all fires and floods you know. You have to deal with the little stuff too.]

The other being withheld the smile and the most glorious sunset happened on one of their planets right before a microbe escaped a lab and set off a chain of events that reduced the population by 90% within two weeks but led to a plethora of low-distribution, post-apocalyptic literature that was honestly much better than everything that had come before. [Well, then. I will leave you be. See you in another tenth of an infinity or so.]

The other didn’t respond and had already returned attention elsewhere and the furrowing continued as they watched the couple sit at the table watching each other